Been seeing this guy for a couple of months and things are going great! He has a great personality, nothing like my ex, and loves Grey’s Anatomy almost as much as I do. I think I could really see a future with him, only problem is, he hasn’t asked me to be his girlfriend yet. Maybe i’m just being paranoid but why won’t he commit?
If this sounds familiar to you, don’t worry you’re not alone; millions suffer in this limbo/purgatory stage every day. Really sucks when Mr. Right comes along and you’re wondering to yourself what you did to deserve him, only for some time to pass and he still isn’t any more committed than when you first met. Sure he’s never missed a Taco Tuesday at your place and it really seems like mom won’t have too much to say about this one, besides one burning question; why won’t he give you a label?
First off let me just say, everyone has been in this same predicament at least once and if they say otherwise, don’t worry they’re lying. The forecast is always a bit foggy in the beginning of every relationship. Don’t you remember those days where you didn’t want to be the first to call, or making yourself wait at least eight minutes before responding back to a text? If not, either you’re too young and shouldn’t be here or too old and every form of communication was made by pigeon post anyway.
There could be a few reasons as to why your leading man hasn’t made the exclusive relationship leap yet but we just wanted to stress the word could. Although according to my calculations if you’ve found yourself reading this post, there’s a good chance that something on this list applies to you. So why don’t we get started doing what we women do best, dissect every thing that’s ever happened and let all signs direct us to him being a cheating bastard (even though you’re not officially dating yet).
Maybe it is that blonde bitch Mandy from work. Just wanted to get the cheating assumption out the way first since its usually the first conclusion all us women jump to. Sometimes unfortunately, it is the blonde bitch Mandy from work and if you’ve managed to fall for a cheater the good news is, there’s no label. It’s much easier to disappear from someone’s life when all you have to do is stop answering their phone calls. It’s not like you live together, or have any children so don’t make it more difficult than what it has to be. If he’s juggling women now, a label probably won’t make him stop multitasking. Leave him and never look back, unless you enjoy some ‘Bad Girls Club’ type drama.
It has only been 8 weeks. One thing about us women is a guy can give us a compliment and it’ll have us thinking how handsome he’d look on our wedding day but this is where the crazy stops. It hasn’t been long since you two met so maybe he wants to get to know you a little better -i.e., figure out if you’re nuts first. Think about this as a trial phrase. You only have to hide the crazy for a couple months tops before he pops the question. Now there is a limit to this. If you have been dealing with him for anytime over 6 months, chances are he’ll never make it exclusive. You know how grandma’s favorite lecture starts, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
He’s not the commitment type. The worst case scenario even worse than cheating would have to be, he just doesn’t do relationships. In my opinion this is the worst guy on the list because you’ll never know why. He could be damaged or maybe he’s never even been traumatized. This is the type of guy that cares about you, loves you, is loyal to you, but just doesn’t see the point in making things official. Sometimes these guys stay with the same person for years and if it ends, they’re engaged to someone new after 2 months. Here’s looking at you Mr. Big. This situation is one you’ll have to decide for yourself if you’re ok with. Sure you’ll have all the ingredients for a match made in heaven but on the flip side you’ll be calling someone your boyfriend at 35.
He’s just not that into you. The last possible reason on the list is maybe he’s not as into you as you think. You two might be mimicking what real couples do but cupid just never showed up. If this happens, you might think he may be difficult to let go but it’s really the idea of what you two could have been, that’s putting up a fight. You never really had him to begin with and he never really cared. So make arrangements to call your girlfriends over one night so you can dramatically say goodbye by deleting him from all your social media accounts. At least you won’t have to watch him live his life unbothered while you struggle through the same symptoms of a break-up.
The last thing I should probably mention is to never read too deep into anyone in the early stages. Usually when a man says something, thats just what he means. So if he says to you: “I just don’t do relationships” or “I’m not interested in anything right now” or “I like you”, then congrats you know exactly where you two stand. I know, we women have a natural ability to turn everything (including insults) into “I’m going to die without you” but unless he says that, he’ll be just fine without you.
Thanks for reading and let us know in the comments if you’ve dealt with any of these situations before.
Written By : Hazel of the Dahlia Girls