We all remember the sandbox days; a time where life seemed so simple. Wake up, hang out with friends, spend time with family, and repeat. Then we grow up and those relationships aren’t as easy to maintain. It especially stings when those relationships are with family members. Well there is a happier alternative; stop giving a damn. Here’s why you don’t always need to get along with family.
You may be asking yourself what sort of person would give up on family and I’ve got an answer for you; a person that’s lost all their f*cks to give. May sound harsh but that doesn’t mean I’m crying myself to sleep every night with a Hershey’s bar either. Life is honestly more peaceful with certain people kept at a certain distance. Still shaking your head? Well let me attempt to explain.
I’ve done all I can :
This is the point of exhaustion. When the talks have turned into screaming matches, birthdays turn into brawls, or social media posts turn petty it’s time to throw in the towel. You may have given it everything you had but just like all relationships you cannot control another person’s actions. You may be ready to forgive and forget but what if they’re prepping for round 2? It’s ok to retire when all your efforts seem pointless or when every attempt at reconciliation only worsens the relationship. Sometimes you have to back out of he situation and let time do the healing. Of course there’s a chance you two may never be back on good terms but you knowing you fought the good fight to repair things should put you at some sort of ease. I mean who wants to keep trying when they know they’re going to fail? That’s like scarfing down a number 4 from McDonalds then hitting the gym; just stay home.
Toxic people :
If there’s one thing I know about toxic people, it’s that they are the most predictable people alive. Sure they do some pretty messed up things but what else do you expect? They have volunteered themselves for a lifetime of stress because they don’t want things any other way. These individuals are a lot like a hamster on a wheel; they just keep running in the same squeaky cage wondering why their surroundings still appear the same. That’s because they like spinning round and round in bullsh*t. If you’ve come into contact with a toxic person or worse, you’re actually related to them; do yourself a favor and bow out of the equation. Toxic people are completely unaware of their decisions and other people’s feelings because they were never taught to share their toys as a child. Make sure you can recognize these individuals, acknowledge them, then move on. Kind of the same way you spot a family of gorillas at the zoo.
Prioritize yourself :
If you clicked on this post it’s probably because you can relate to losing a relationship with a relative you were once close with. While that can be a very heavy burden it doesn’t have to be. You can’t change people so don’t stress yourself trying to do so. You can look back on the situation and realize it was a low point or a sad time but you can’t stay in that moment. After mourning the loss of that person, you have to move on with your life at some point. It may feel as though things are eerily different and will never be the same but one day you’ll realize it was all a blessing in disguise.
Your happiness is what you have to prioritize because if you’re not mentally and emotionally healthy, it’s only going to affect you. Sure there’s a chance they may be as torn up about the falling out as you, then there’s also the chance they’re not. Why shouldn’t you still get to enjoy life? They may be blood but that never automatically secures any sort of loyalty between two people. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking “they’re my family, they have my back.” Just because they should doesn’t mean they will. Of course this may be a sad occasion now but it will get better. Whether you two mend things or you learn to live without them and love them from a distance; life will go back to normal. Besides, if you just can’t accept things the way they are you can always try again. Just make sure there’s plenty of alcohol if you do.
Thanks for reading and let us know if you’ve ever had to deal with a split from a relative and how you did it.