How to Get Her to Sleep with You

It’s a well known thing that men love, no, worship sex. It’s also a well known thing that women don’t give it up as easily. So when an attractive woman comes along and you need help escaping from blue ball hell, how do you get her to sleep with you? Try these 4 tips listed below.

Being a woman I am totally selling out my fellow ladies in order to give you men some insight into the female mind and how it all works. Most men have no idea about women and the rest think they do but it’s because we want you to believe that you got it all figured out. The reality of it is, as complex as women are, cracking our code is quite simple.

Tip 1 : I always warn that not all women are the same but for the 99% of us that actually have a soul, emotional satisfaction is what it all comes down to. If you can connect with a woman, congrats, you’ve just been granted access. I’m not even referring to falling in love, just good meaningful conversation is enough. And I mean the talks that don’t make you want to fall asleep or zone off to some other mental destination. Ask her questions about who she is and what she enjoys, the only trick here is you have to be genuinely interested. Because if you aren’t we can easily detect it.

Tip 2 : If you are not interested in her as a person but would like to still sleep with her because you’re attracted then fake it. You know the same way she’s going to fake that orgasm with you because there’s no connection there? Sure there’s nothing there between the two of you, except for condoms (hopefully) and you’re both phonies but…that’s it. You were probably waiting for me to mention how there is a upside to this but there’s no good coming out of this situation. The two of you will probably never speak again.

Tip 3 : This next tip is for the morally corrupt few out there still walking the streets. If she’s at a vulnerable point, like fresh out of a break up or experiencing trouble in her current relationship, that’s an opportune moment to make your move. If you’ve kind of been involved in her life or if you two just met and she mentions recently splitting with her ex, you’ve hit the lucky lottery. It’s common for women to hate their ex or boyfriend so much that they’ll sleep with someone they don’t even want just to piss them off. This is one of those “right place at the right time” sort of moments but if you follow the correct script for dealing with vulnerable women, eventually things could lead to sex. You may have to sit through what seems like an endless conversation about another man but once it’s over, all you have to utter is “you don’t deserve to be treated that way”, now you’ve got her.

Tip 4 : You could always go the declare bankruptcy route after taking her out on the most expensive date ever. But there’s levels to a nice date. The idea of spending $50 may scare some of you while others may be willing to spend hundreds. If you’ve got the finances then this is almost a sure way to sleep with a woman. Might not happen after the first date but chances are if the date is so good it’s memorable for her, she won’t slap you if you make a move on her. The key is to make us feel special, like we’re the only one you would try this hard for. Eventually she won’t be able to hold out any longer.

Lastly, realize women love sex just as much as Β men. We’re not supposed to, according to society but with the right guy sex is equivalent to the most addictive drug. So when we do agree to go on a date or spend any sort of time with you it’s because we could see ourselves sleeping with you (as long as you haven’t been friend zoned of course). The only thing we’re waiting for is the right moment. We contemplate a lot when it’s acceptable for us to finally have sex with a guy. So each time you say or do the right thing it’s just like figuring out another number to the safe. The safe being our box. The box being our vagina. Even after me betraying the female community with this post I’m going to wish you good luck. With all my tips you’re still going to need a miracle; we are women and all women are psycho.

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