Pretty safe to say we’ve all experienced that one person in our lives where the chemistry was amazing, they were easy to just be with, and the sex was nothing short of mind blowing. Then (cue screeching halt) things never went any further. Picturing someone in your head yet? Well if you did and you want to know what went wrong; keep reading to find out why some relationships never gain a title.
1) It could be you.
If you’ve found yourself in a predicament where things are great and you’re waiting for the “exclusive talk” to come up one day, punch yourself. This is clearly someone you are beginning to develop feelings for, if you haven’t already, so why can’t you bring it up? Stop waiting for them to make the move if you would like to see things progress to the next phase. Be assertive because you could find yourself years later, still waiting, only for them to end up moving forward with someone else. Imagine the shock when they send you a wedding invite because they moved forward with someone that wasn’t afraid to ask questions. It’ll probably be signed “this could be us but you playing.”
2) F*ck the past.
I’m going to dedicate this portion to myself because since my break-up, it’s difficult to emotionally attach myself to anyone. Not that I’m trying to jump into another relationship but now I naturally repel emotions and it’s obvious. Don’t think for one second if you’re not completely over your previous relationship that others can’t tell. Casual dating exists so people can get to know each other, like a trial phase. So if you bring up your ex every other date don’t be shocked if you stop hearing from your new love prospect. No one wants to progress with you if they feel that they have to compete with your past. Not to mention it kind of makes a person feel like a rebound. Nothing’s sexier than feeling like someone’s only with you because things didn’t work out with that other person.
3) Sex too soon?
I had to ask the question. I know, I hate myself too. But how quickly you had sex with someone can set the standard of the relationship. Having sex too soon can send several different messages. Such as, they probably jump in bed easily and with a lot of people. In other words I’m not special to them, so maybe they shouldn’t be so special to me. Once this mindset has been put into motion it’s almost impossible to break it. If someone views you like this or vice versa, some level of respect has been lost. And let’s be real, no one takes anyone home to mother that they don’t respect. So think back to that foggy night you were just trying to have fun and wonder if that’s why things never went past the bedroom. Probably because that’s where it all started, why change location?
4) Wrong timing
This is usually the reason why many relationships never go exclusive. It could just simply be the wrong time. Maybe you two just met, maybe they’re about to experience a big life change, maybe they just want to focus on their career without the worries of a relationship or like two million other possibilities. Timing is everything and if they know that, they also know that things wouldn’t work right now. So why take the risk of ruining what the two of you have? But ask yourself if you’re ok waiting because you may not like the time frame for when they might be ready. Note the word, might.
The most important thing to remember is you do have a say as to when certain milestones should be reached. This isn’t a ride at the amusement park that you ended up not liking but had to wait for it to end. This is your life that you have complete control over so make sure your expectations are communicated to your partner. Whether the relationship is young or not, don’t waste your time or theirs. Unless you’re happy to waste time, just learn to smile so when they give you the “it’s not me, it’s you” speech (make sure you read that correctly) you don’t look too stupid.