Destiny’s child said it best “All the women who are independent, throw your hands up at me!” I guess they were too busy gassing up all us females to follow this song up with a “how to be independent and in a healthy relationship” sequel. Well we’re going to get down to the bottom of why independent women who should be considered ‘trophy wives’ are a bit of a turn off for some. Here’s some reasons why most independent women are single af :
Reason 1: Theres no off button
Ok so being independent is more of a lifestyle than a skill set. It’s not something that comes out every now and then when its convenient. True independent women never need any help. Not when we open doors, or carry groceries or even hold down an entire household. That sounds great until mr. right comes along and we have to set aside our independent superpowers so he can feel useful. Most women that do everything for themselves don’t know when to stop or especially ask for help. Sometimes we get so used to being alone it takes a constant reminder that we don’t have to fend for ourselves anymore and who wants to be in a relationship where they have to beg their partner to notice them? Not so sexy. Maybe being a damsel in distress isn’t so bad (yea, fuck that).
Reason 2: Help offends her
Independent women are not only do-it-alls that never need any help but sometimes we make matters even worse when we are offended by a helping hand. Someone offering assistance doesn’t sound like a bad thing right? Well to the independent woman, it’s an indication of failure, a reflection of things she can’t do. In other words, prepare for a verbal beat down because this is how an independent woman’s ego gets damaged. The independent woman takes pride in doing things on her own, very rarely does she like someone else to handle her responsibilities. Just like she more than likely had to learn how to be self-sufficient, she will have to unlearn it too. Yea, good luck with that.
Reason 3: Confusion
It’s very easy to confuse the roles between who’s dominant and who’s submissive but never make the mistake of trying to make the independent woman docile. Because she’s been in charge, she’s used to not having to answer to and not having to worry about anyone else’s approval or feelings. This is the perfect recipe for absolute failure. In every relationship or situation-ship there needs to be clear lines set for who plays which part and who’s in charge of which role. That the way theres an even exchange of power. The independent woman would rather chop off her left arm than relinquish any sort of power so have fun with that.
Ok so even though these reasons sounded absolutely horrible, there’s still some really great reasons to date an independent woman. Like she’s a great debater, she’s not completely clueless, and you never have to open any doors for her. It could honestly be a win for any man that doesn’t mind slipping into the background and staying there like a good partner. Let me know how that works out for you.